There's junk in the trunk, if my ass was my front.

Knocked Up.
Bun in the oven.
Pea in the pod.
Preggo.
A bump in the front.
Up the duff.

However you say it, it means I get to stop sucking in my gut for at least 9 months and let whatever hang out, hang out. I have a legit excuse. Hopefully though, I won't "look" preggers until at least 5 months, I mean, two months along and people start asking? I should have re-thought that third boston creme donut from Dunkin' (and by third, I mean fifth).

I don't care how much you plan for a baby, it still comes as a "shock" or "surprise" when that test comes back with two lines instead of one. "Test results are visible after 3 minutes". Bullshit. They are visible right away, you can see that first little pink line start appearing as soon as you've run out of pee. How gross is that test? Of course I put the cap back on the stick part after I've peed on it, but that cap goes on and you can see the wet stick and the condensation on the cap, it is so gross. TMI I know, but these are the things that freak me out. C'mon.

For me, or rather us, (there was definitely two in this tango), this is our second and I feel more confident about what I'm in for this time. I had planned a summer baby for the second time around. Why? What is my logic in this seemingly planned and thought out..plan? I want to have a pool party for a birthday party and inflatables outside in the sun. Yes, my whole reason behind a summer baby, better parties. Go on, judge me, but I know you'd rather go to a pool party then get on your six layers and walk out in the snow to arrive at some enclosed gymnasium and enjoy some claustrophobic fun with ten 3 year olds in a crammed party facility. I would. Plus, who doesn't like the idea of pina coladas at a baby birthday party in the sunshine? NOT I.

I sit here, with all the world's thoughts streaming at warp speed through my mind, what was I thinking? How can we afford another one? What am I going to do with work? My first one is so awesome, how can the second one compare? I hope I havent' screwed it up by having another one..... Will my first one freak out? Do they have cute bathing suits for heavily pregnant women who don't want to look like houses in their 8th month? Am I going to get fatter than before? Am I really pregnant? Has it really only been a few weeks without a drink, how much longer again? My boobs hurt, how much bigger are they going to get? How long can I hide this at work before I have to start wearing a sign or an arrow pointed at my belly "I have the golden ticket". (Best white trash pregnancy top ever, thank you Britney Spears). When should I tell my boss? When should I tell my employees?

Most importantly, when does the puking start? I am anticipating this one, and not looking forward to the sleepless nights and hung over feeling at work, it leaves me with.

All of these are pretty lame worries I know, I do have more substantial worries and fears, but I usually override those with my immature brain and focus on where I can start a new registry and the quickest cheapest way to get deals and freebies for newly pregnant parents.

I wonder when I can pull the preggo card for the first time, knowing that I have at least a full hand of these cards, I don't want to hand them all out at once, but rather hold on to them for desperate moments, or in my case, exceptionally lazy moments when I'd rather not move in comparison to doing anything else.

Whatever we have it is going to be a surprise. Much to the dismayal of my friends and family, I don't want to find out, until it is OUT. Yes, we are screwed if we have a girl, but I can always buy clothes later. Joseph wants a baby brother and he is going to name him "Plex". Of course he is. I do find this very cool of him though, because he just LOVES Plex and anything that he would bestow that name upon or associate it with is coolness, so this to me means that Joseph is excited and has already decided that his baby brother is going to be cool. If it's a girl, I don't know what he'll say.

I look forward to blogging about all the weird and wonderful things that pregnancy and post pregnancy does to my brain and how I have a legit excuse for these crazy thoughts. Legit? Well, at least an excuse. That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

3 weeks down, only 37 more to go. Go Team Baby P!