Thursday, July 8, 2010

Will run for Beer.

It's a cute slogan sent to me by someone you can buy in a necklace for like $20, I totally want it. Though mine would really say "will run for rum". I got back in the saddle again (thanks Willie) last night. I started running with a limp, that was totally seksi, I'm sure. I think it's where I have been favoring my right leg and limping around on it, so I just kept pushing it and ran my usual 28:00 again. If that isn't 5K it's pretty damn close, I measured it a while back and can't remember the actual distance but it's around 3.2 or 3.4 miles as I remember. The killer for me is in the middle of the run, before I turn around I have to run up a hill, I HATE IT and my time would be MUCH better if I didn't do the hill, but I feel by keeping the hill in my training I am getting used to obstacles in my running course (not always are they going to be lovely shady and flat) but I'm pushing myself harder to better my time with a harder section in my run. My Ipod died like 5 minutes in, so I had to listen to myself run again. I run past people wtih my earphones in and I wonder if they are talking about me, "Look at the way she is running, she's struggling!" is what I imagine them to say when I have my earphones IN and ON, but they don't know they are turned off, so I am waiting to catch one of the walkers as I run by saying something about me. Not to say anything back to them, but just to solidify my suspicions. Seriously though, who do I think I am? Am I really paranoid about people talking about the way I am running - how my flabby fatty thights are flapping in the wind? Am I really this narcassistic to actually believe people talk about me after having only met me as I wizz by in running pants and a sweaty mid section top? Nah, no one talks about me, but I think it would be funny to hear the people on their porch actually think they are safe saying something about me out loud "Oh here comes lound breather thunder thighs agian, she looks like she's gonna die, if she drops dead, you have to do the mouth to mouth, I ain't touchin' her".... lol. I imagine it, but I don't for one second believe that anyone is taking time out of their day to say something out loud, do I believe they think it, oh hell yes, just like I do, I judge everyone around me all day long, I just dont' say it out aloud until I am at least 4 beers deep.

I feel good after running, I stopped before I ended my usual actual run, I usually exercise for 45 minutes - 1 hour running anywhere from 5 miles to 10 K, but this was my first night back after my longest stint off running since I started and it was BLAZING hot, even at 9pm at night, so I decided to give it a rest. Came home, strapped some ice to my right leg and knee, took some vitamins and some advil and watched a cute movie with Paul. Joseph is getting really upset when he sees me go running because he really wants to go with me, I'd have Paul drag him along but Paul can't do much on his feet for too long before it hurts, so I have to figure out a way to incorporate Joseph, if he wants to exercise and run I should be doing all that I can to foster it.

I have had the pleasure of recently being able to watch several good movies/features/documentaries. Film that doesn't just go boom in the night (though those are my favorite kinds), film that makes me think a little afterwards. I like it. I haven't finished my latest sock monster, I have stalled in attaching his arms and legs, much to Joseph's dismay because we have pledged to name this sock monster "Peanut Butter Pants", this name requires a creative and funny story telling decription of Joseph's latest obsession, something I will have to devote an entire blog post to. SO we watched "Timer" last night, dear netflix, how do I love thee? Let me count the ways... An interesting concept, you get fit with a "Timer" that counts down to the actual moment that you will meet the "one", no more finding or guessing at love, no more divorce, it times down to actually finding the one you are meant to be with forever on this earth. So if your timer is counting down for another 5,000 days, do you just go out and date and sleep with whomever, whenever, wihtout consequence and don't get head over heels because you know this person isn't the one? Or if you are in a relationship and you get a timer and it doesn't match the other person's timer do you just bail out of the relationship immediately? A thought provoking look at what defines relationships, if you can't find the one you love, love the one you're with? Do you stay with this one even if you don't know for sure, do you ignore the timer and go with your gut that could most likely be wrong? Would it ruin the surprise? I told Paul we should never get

Tuesday, July 6, 2010

Living Simply and the Irony

First things first, I haven't run since my first 5K race on Saturday, cuz of my bum knee and I miss it. I miss striving for a goal, pushing myself harder and I miss the time alone with my limited thoughts. I hope to run again soon, I really don't want to permanently injury myself so it is taking every ounce of my being to just sit and not run, perhaps tomorrow I will try it out again, or maybe I'll wait until Thursday, I really want to run and not stop again.

Paul and I just finished a documentary called "180 degrees South". It incorporates, what I am sure is a small portion of the lives of the creators of the patagonia clothing company and North Face companies and merges with the climbing aspirations and dreams of a fellow "dirt bag" (meaning someone who can live out of their car or back pack and just lives and works to surf or climb or just live to do things with the earth). The creators of these multi million dollar companies and this one guy have a lot in common though decades separate them in age years. It was amazing to see, I am sure these men are billionaires but yet choose to continue to "live simply" and give back to the earth by means of restoration to remote parts of Chile, namely, Patagonia. I won't recount the story line by any means, but it is definitely worth seeing, especially if you feel like making yourself seem small and having it point in your face what you do everyday really isn't anything, in the grand scheme of things, its just getting out of bed and going to work. You aren't noticing enough or much about the world around you, as you lounge on your newly purchased patio set from Target on the comfort of your nice patio in the evening dusk on your laptop, as I am doing right now.

Live Simply is really the message from this documentary. I'm not going to get all philosophical on how deep this message really is, but just how in less than two hours it impacted me, to make real change I am almost sure not, but the impact is there, and maybe over time it might change something within me. I admire these fellows and how they can live simply, Yvon (the founder of Patagonia company) said in this film that people often complicate living simply, it can be a very complicated and difficult thing if you just don't get it. How true. The first thing I thought of was how you can buy Live Simply signs to hang in your house, to decorate your abode, you can purchase the phrase and the thing Live Simply for less than $9.99 at Gordmans or some other crappy store I have come to personally know as "typical American shelves loaded with bullshit items" store that is just filled with crap, total crap, they sell these signs about living simply, but nothing in their stores offer such meaning. Ironic? Yes. Or you can just live simply and never set foot in a store like that ever again.

You could go completely off grid and live off the earth, own 2 pairs of jeans, never worry about underwear and forget any kind of grooming whatsoever. You could also forget getting laid, although I'm sure, that because sex is a basic human desire, you could still find it some where, a little less sexy, but probably equally as gratifying, its amazing the kinds of people that are able to procreate, or just, get some.

Live simply could be as complicated as I want it to be. Dave Ramsey says to leave below your means, live simply means to live just above survival, it means to forget all the bullshit and return what the earth gave you, without even checking your credit score. I could buy a live simply sign from Gordmans and I would be doing the complete opposite of it's meaning. I could go completely off grid and live simply, but that sounds complicated, especially with a 3 year old. I thought of Joseph being one of these "dirt bags", one of these guys that just live and work to get to the next big swell, or the next great climb, find other friends with similiar simple goals and live simply, just be happy. Would he skype me and tell me all about it? Would I get to read emails about his adventures, maybe he'd get to pick up an old roatry phone somewhere in the world and try to give his mum a ring to update me. I'd just love it. If Joseph grew up to have nothing and be blissfully happy, living simply, I would adore the idea and him. Joseph has a keen sense of his surroundings, I wouldn't be surprised if he did something like that, he has a keen sense for companionship, friendship and emotion. He shows great love and I'm sure could share that with someone and some great things. What an adventure to live simply, to go off grid and just see where that day takes you, then the next, then the next. Never having to worry about some bullshit issue at your job that pays your bills so you don't have to live simply, but comfortably. Joseph could do it, and whatever he does, I hope that he does it simply and doesn't get eaten alive by laziness and "things" that drive society nowadays. I know that Joseph won't know what I mean when I say, "I truly want you to be happy", because that is the honest, simple truth. Happiness can come in many forms but it is long lasting and nourishing when it comes the simplest. If Joseph got to what gave him the most happiness in life everyday, I would, in turn be happy. I know I can create my own happiness, but I can also be fulfilled completely knowing that my son is truly, madly, deeply happy.

Happiness right now, might be that drum set or bicycle I'm looking at giving Joseph for Christmas, but a bike doesn't last forever, that smile becuase of that bike won't last forever, but that smile knowing there is so much more to life and to others and to purpose, can live on for generations. I don't think I could teach that to anyone, because I myself don't live it, but I know it exists, it is possible and it isn't such a bad thing to strive for it.

If this phrase "Live Simply" could be adopted by many people, especially in the United States, a lot of problems would be gone. Instead of buying a phrase, adopt it, live it, turn it into something so that when you leave this earth, the true meaning of it lives on, forever. I will try to live simply more and more everyday. Yes I am consumed by modern society, hell, I live in it and I actually like the crazy lazy conveniences, sometimes they are fascinating, but there are small elements of living simply I can adopt everyday, without having to go off grid. I don't want to climb mountains (Dear God I look down from 3 steps and I get woozy), I don't want to live out of my backpack (I love hot showers and feeling clean a lot), I have no desire to be a "dirt bag" working just to find the next big wave, but I do get it, I really get it.

I do understand Live Simply, and I admire those that do, how completely fascinating to have nothing but the adventure ahead of you.

Saturday, July 3, 2010

I'm a runner, I need a cuter outfit.

I was the only "exerciser" that was wearing long yoga pants to run this 5K today. I wore long legs because I had my ankles taped up to my mid calf and had a knee brace on, white tape over my very sexy pink and white legs that haven't seen the sun in what looks like a millenia... not so sexy. I saw women in running "skorts", 3/4 length yoga pants, racer back stretchy tops and t shirts from other races. I can't wait to be "that girl" wearing to the race another race t shirt I got. Before a 5K it is a great chance to people watch. I KNOW I looked like the girl who'd never run a 5K before, especially at the end when I tried to stop at the finish line and they said "NO! keep going" so I thought they meant running, so I picked up running, then they said "NO! just keep walking!" I'm a pro, watch out people. There were hundreds of people milling about, all Andrea and I talked about were our nerves. I was nervous, only about my adrenaline, I just needed to keep a lid on it. Were they going to blow a whistle? blow an air horn? When will we know to line up? The follow the masses mentality really kicks in when you have no idea what you are doing, I just followed the crowd and started when I saw people in front of me starting. Weird how that works. Also weird how my body works, I got home at almost 1am last night after seeing only one movie at the drive in, and told myself I needed 6 hours of awesome sleep. I got to sleep, set my alarm for 6:15 (knowing I could slap the snooze button a time or two more before I absolutely had to get going) but my body naturally woke up at 5:57am, way to go body, that happens every time I have something important going on in the morning, I can always rely on my body to remind me I need to be up! I was such a newbie at this running thing I stopped an organizer and asked if I needed to go to registration or pre registration (turns out pre, since I "pre" registered by mailing in my form). That was cool. Then I walked into the pre-registration area and inadvertently joined the line for the toilet. I stood there until my eye caught I group of people walking to the back and then I saw race packets. Follow the masses mentality kicked in there again! I probably would have just stood there in that line for the toilet until I got there and realized that was the wrong line and didn't need to pee, but would have faked it anyway to avoid further embarrassment, I mean what kind of idiot just stands in the line for the toilet when they need to be pre-registering?

Running around a bourbon making factory provided to be beautiful and interesting. The grounds are just beautiful, the running trail, shady, cool and gorgeous. Running around the smells of bourbon, not so great. Thank god I hadn't been drinking heavily any time recently, I would have thrown up, in fact, the smell did get to me, I thought I was going to have to dry heave after taking in a big wiff.

People of all sizes, it appears can "run" a 5K. I realize I am using quotation marks excessively in this post, so I'll try to stop being so sarcastic, but that can be very hard to do especially for me. One girl infront of me was easily over the 185lb mark, she stayed ahead of me the entire time, I kept pace behind two older women both in their 40's, if that isn't the case they need to stay out of the sun, because their orange complexion and leather like skin really made them look that way. I run today with a bunch of broad range white people. The only black person was, yup, you guessed it, finished in 14 minutes. He looked like he was foreign, like ethopian foreign. One of the runners around my area was this guy that looked like a total try hard. He was ill prepared with wavy long exercise pants (probably starter shit from wal mart) he was wearing a cap backwards with the letter "D" on it, GUESS WHAT THAT STANDS FOR :) and would run, like flat out for 10 seconds, then stop panting and sweating, I'd pass him, and he'd do it again. NOT a runner, needs to get a good pace going. I give him props for trying, not everyone wants or has idea what they are getting themselves into with a 5K, so he tried and made it but he also looked pretty dumb. Look at me all high and mighty after my first run, judging everyone around me, not to worry though I have a fairly good perception of how I look when I run. I look like I'm going to start crying and it hurts all over, an added bonus is the fact that I can see my thigh fat jiggling or "waving" in the wind on my shadow, with every stride I take. Again I highlight frustration at not losing weight and working so hard. That's it, I'll just give up eating, I've already (to much distress) my drinking, that Litre of malabu rum has stayed suspiciously full, I should start "sleep drinking" that would be hilarious!

Time to reward myself and today's achievement with a nice rum and pineapple juice, sun and water. Oh yeah.


Not sure what is cooler right now, the fact that I finished my first 5K in a GREAT time (for my very first one) or the fact that I didn't keel over at the finish line. It was fun, the only "hard" part was at the very beginning when I was trying to navigate through all the crowds to get me some running space, that was very annoying. I didn't know if I was going to want to stop or need to stop, I just kept going. My real goal was to keep up with Andrea since her training had been going well and I have been plagued with a knee/leg/ankle injury and took two days off. Plus I only made 28 minutes in a row, no stopping, once, so the fact that I hadn't yet run a complete 5K yet was nerve racking. I also (very annoyingly) fought off adrenaline and the feeling like I needed to take off like a shot for like the first 2 miles, so when I actually needed the shot at the end, my adrenaline had already worn off and I was just sore and tired.

I wrapped my ankles like I used to before a dancing competition and that really helped, I also wore a knee bandage which was kind of ok, but I don't think I'll wear it again unless I can see a definite improvement wearing it, it kind of psyched me out I was very aware of teh bandage throughout the entire race. I think we were towards the end of the "running" pack. I bet the last actual runner came in at around the 40:00 mark. The winner for the BGSG in my age group timed at 23:00, so if I ran at 23:00 again, I'd come in like 6th place in my age group. I bet one day I could run it in under 25:00, but I think my goal here is to get to a comfortable pace and run a 10K. I'm going to let Andrea talk me into doing a half marathon or duathalon, I don't really want to, I like to start off small, but I'll let Andrea coax me into the idea, it really is a lot easier with a running buddy! It was so nice and extra fun/special to share this first race with her! It was more fun because of the friendship I think, I could have done it on my own, but I bet I might have stopped, also Paul and Joseph had a pal there, Bailey Jake and Joseph got to play and run around and Brad and Paul got to work on their bromance. What a great cheer team, Paul spent the entire time running around the course trying to get different photos of Andrea and I mid run so we could look back at it all, that was very considerate of Paul, I will be able to look back and know everything about my first race! I've given Joseph the running bug, so I will enter him in the fastest kid in town race in August as well as any little run I can put him in. I bet right now he could run 1/2 mile no problem. I might start training him, it'll be difficult, because I'd have to have "two" training/exercise sessions a day, one for me and one for him, but there's much more I'd do for that kid so it's not that bad.

I'm ready to run more 5K. I'm ready to lose some weight after kicking my arse at exercising. That was never my actual goal to loose weight, but now I'd like to see something come off, the sweat says that should be so!

I'm working on resting my knee, the next 5K in July 21st I think, BGSG, maybe shave it down to 30:00 by then? I like to dream big!

Friday, July 2, 2010

Fly eating Rabbit

I made another sock monster, in lieu of being unable to run for the past 2 days (I really feel so weird that I haven't hit the pavement - it's so strange) I decided to put my time to better use than the laundry, so instead of folding the laundry I cut it up and used some of the laundry to create yet another strange sock monster. At 1:30am last night, I put my most unusual moniker yet to my latest creation - "Bacon". He looked like a piece of bacon, kinda with the type and color of sock I used, Joseph woke up to find him and said I made the "coolest donkey monster ever!". It does sort of look like a donkey. Joseph lined up all four of my monster creations and had then "Sweeping (sleeping)" on the living room floor. His favorite was still Hairy Henry octopus. I think that I am going to make sock monsters and give them to people as gifts, like for kids, or newborns, though they could be kinda scary, I still hand made them and I still have a handful of handmade things from my nan or mum (relatives that were crafty), handmade just isn't done anymore, it could be kind of special. So watch out, you might already know what kind of gift you are getting if you are any friend of mine!!

Our dog (the one with less than required brain cells to function like a dog so we call him rabbit) catches flies, and eats them. Now that it is the summer time and we don't have hardly any windows and no doors with fly mesh, flies just manage to come right in whenever we open our french doors to the side of the house. Luckily for us, Rabbit engages his stealth and fakes "dog" on these flies, he waits until they are within striking distance, then "SNAP!", like a venus fly trap, snaps up that fly, smacks it around in his gums for a second and swallows. Beats an aerosol can and a messy fly swat that usually leaves me cleaning up fly guts on a window. Very environmentally friendly if you ask me, a fly catching dog. He is also earning his rent this way. Rabbit is not the sharpest tool in the shed, but is the most colorful. He's the dog I got when I thought Dingo, our first dog, needed a friend. Rabbit is the dog I got from the shelter when I was just going to "look only", he's also the dog I told Paul was on a "trail basis" and he's also the dog that squeaks instead of barking, we should have called him squeaker - though that is his nick name.

So what about running? I haven't run since Wednesday night and that was a pathetic effort. Andrea and I tried to run the Buffalo Chase course just to see what it looked like so we'd be more prepared when we raced on Saturday, that was FAIL, we got a good idea, but ran for like 17 minutes and I thought that my right leg was going to snap and my knee cap just fall out under my skin and land in my sock. I can't believe the level of pain I was in, I now understand the true meaning of "wincing" in pain. I had a few tears come to my eyes... I have grudgingly taken Thursday and Friday off running, which stresses me out. I had only just run 28+ minutes straight for the first time, I was hoping to run longer again second time around so that by Saturday I'd feel very confident not only I could finish without walking, but finish in a reasonable amount of time. I just don't feel prepared now and I feel nervous and I know my adrenaline is going to get the better of me, I'm going to have to spend the first mile or two calming myself down into a comfortable run and breathing pattern.. dammit. My knee hurts just sitting and a sharp pain shoots through my right leg every now and again. I don't care though, I am GOING to race on Saturday and push myself to run the whole thing. Even if I have to take a week off afterwards.

Friday before race day, running a few errands, making sure I have pasta for dinner and probably going to see Toy Story 3 again, this time at the drive in. I have never wanted to see a movie again while it is at the theatres, but Joseph just loved it and he would love to see it again and I would love to take him, I bet he has a great time at the drive in! Going to the drive in would check off one of my summer to do list items, though I really wanted to see Iron Man 2 at the drive in, Toy Story 3 should be good enough, second time around!

Time to get out of my pyjamas and do something on this fantastic day that I am NOT at work and at home with my super fantastic family. Something must be done - quick, to the bat mobile!