Monday, November 12, 2012

Drinking in the shower.

Yeah, I just did that.  I just George Castanza-ed my evening, to the max.  I just You tube-esqued my evening into the most awesome Mash Up ever known.  Better than my most favorite mash up ever known to man.

I enjoyed 1/4 of a bottle of red wine whilst simultaneously enjoying a piping hot shower.

Yes I did.

And it was magical.

How have I not ever thought of this before?  Going along with the premise that there are no more new ideas, like there are no more new movie ideas, I mean, why the hell would be be seeing a Judge Dredd remake already or a freaking Spiderman re-do for the fifth time in 3 years?  Surely someone else, just as brilliant, dare I say, just a tad more brilliant than me, has already thought of this.

I then ponder that there are day spas that offer the very service that I am talking about.  Drinking during your spa day, but are you enjoying your adult beverage, whilst receiving that massage?  Are you taking sips while in the fountain of youth?

I am.

I just ADDED seven years to my life, (which pretty much evens out if you divide by the many times I've had to hold in a fart, carry the three and try to act like a lady) by reveling in the experience of drinking, and showering in hot steam and massaging water sprays.


This sounds like a dirty movie. Oh, and it is, if your fantasy is just like mine.  Solo piping hot shower, 20 minutes, large glass of red wine, thoughts and music to yourself.

I combined my two (well, pretty much) favorite things in this world.  A piping hot shower, and drinking.  George Castanza would be proud.  Quite possibly not to the level such as eating and enjoying sexual escapades, but definitely, a lot less messier and just as exhilarating.  My activity is actually a lot more practical than eating and sex.  If I were to truly enjoy eating and sex, I'm not sure how viable a chocolate fondue set on our tempurpedic would fare.  I'm not sure how the dipping would succeed in that scenario.  That's what she said.

The moral of the story is this.  If you haven't tried drinking in the shower, I suggest you do.  It's just as efficient as brushing your teeth in the shower, and much more satisfying, the Today Show would know nothing about this.  Live your life like a real person, I'm not saying you need to actually wash yourself, that's what mornings are for, but come home, on a cold evening, start up a piping hot shower, crack open that bottle of wine, pour, and enjoy.

You're welcome.

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